Nury Vittachi
Have you noticed that many supermarket shopping carts have one crazy wheel, and all the other wheels slavishly obey it? “The human is pushing forwards, but Crazy Wheel wants to go in a circle, so we must all go in a circle.”
This is a vital lesson for life. People don’t value logical leaders, only individualistic ones. Proof comes in the shape of three news items sent in by readers.
1) When a choir and orchestra started playing Handel’s Messiah in Britain, music-loving scientist David Glowacki “lurched from side to side with his arms raised” and then “tried to crowd-surf”. Staff threw the theoretical chemist out of the concert hall, but many people pointed out that his response to hearing great music was the right one.
2) Police trying to arrest a felon in the US town of Prattville, Alabama, tried it the standard way with a search warrant, but found the man’s house empty. A creative officer departed from the police manual by putting the man’s dog outside. “Good dog! Where is he? Go get him, boy.” The dog promptly ran to a patch of long grass where his master was hiding, and stood there, wagging his tail.
3) A homeless man in Taguatinga, Brazil, collapsed in the street and an ambulance picked him up. The paramedic noticed that the man’s only friend, a street dog, was running after the vehicle, street after street. The ambulance-man was so deeply moved by this that he did what anybody would do. Yes, he filmed it for YouTube. Eventually, over-riding the rule book, he demanded that the driver stop so that the dog could ride in the ambulance with his friend. This proves a great truth: life really can be a Disney movie.
Of course, most examples of departure from procedure are smaller scale than those above. Some years ago, this writer was downloading a computer programme for his kids when a message flashed on to the screen: “Please wait for the wizard to install this programme.”
The children’s eyes widened. “They’re gonna send a wizard to our house?” I pulled out my phone and pretended to send a text: “No need for wizard. Can install by ourselves.” (It’s very important to impress your children when they are young because when they are teens you become too embarrassing to even be seen with in public.) But I did tell the children that one day we might invite the wizard for tea and cakes.
It’s important to cultivate your uniqueness. Ninety-eight per cent of people are stupid, but luckily I am in the other two per cent.
Family relationships, of course, are the best place to experiment with original thinking.
When my kids are grown-ups who own their own homes, I am going to move in, eat all the food and spend all their money, while announcing at regular intervals: “I’m bored.” After 18 years, I will leave without saying thank you, and then contact them at regular intervals to send cash grants.
Yes, it sounds insane, but I suspect a surprising number of parents reading this column may be thinking: hmm, I might just choose to follow the crazy wheel.
The writer is an Asia-based frequent traveller. Ideas and comments may be sent in via his Facebook page